


Lullaby

by phantomphan4evr



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Explicit Language, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-14
Updated: 2019-10-14
Packaged: 2020-12-16 15:03:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21038159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phantomphan4evr/pseuds/phantomphan4evr
Summary: Bucky has a nightmare he can't wake up from so Steve and Reader try to help.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This idea was actually two separate ideas I managed to turn into a two parter. I'm still new at this, all mistakes are mine!

She was sitting at the table sipping her coffee and reading her book when Steve walked in. He looked at her in surprise. It was early in the morning and the tower was still quiet. They had just gotten back from a mission that was supposed to be a quick in and out job. It ended up being a lot longer and harder than any of them had anticipated and they were all struggling let it go. Normally she would still be in bed with Bucky enjoying the fact that they could just relax especially after a mission that hard.

"Morning." She said bookmarking her spot.

"Morning, what are you doing up so early? Where's Bucky?" He asked looking around. 

"He's still asleep. He had trouble falling asleep last night so I figured I wouldn't bother him and let him catch up on the sleep he lost." She answered, picking at an old chip in her favorite mug. She was quiet for a moment then said "I'm worried about him Steve. He's getting bad again." She looked up at him. He couldn't help but notice the dark circles under her eyes.

He crossed his arms and opened his mouth to reply when they heard a scream come from down the hallway. They both looked towards the sound then at each other. When they heard it again they started running towards the sound, it was coming from Y/N and Bucky's shared room. 

Steve threw the door open and ran inside Y/N hot on his heels; she stopped just inside the doorway. Bucky was in the middle of the bed thrashing around, his hair was plastered to his face with sweat. Her pillow was on the floor and the blanket was half off the bed. 

"FRIDAY please sound proof this room." Steve asked.

"Yes Captain Rogers." The A.I. replied.

Bucky screamed again, a long and ragged sound filled with such pain and terror Steve went to him. "Buck! Buck! Wake up!" He half yelled grabbing his best friends shoulders. It didn't help.

She came to the bedside to help. "Don't. You know we never know what he is going to be like when he's like this." Steve warned holding out a hand to her. She glared at him, "I know what I am doing." She snapped.

"Yes, and I also know Buck would never forgive himself if he hurt you." Steve said with a fire in his eyes. She glared at him for a second longer then looked back at Bucky. 

Her heart broke watching him thrash about on the bed. Whatever nightmares that plagued him had their hooks in deep. Sometimes her and Steve discussing what to do would lessen the hold the dreams had on him, but not this morning. Luckily these nightmares were occurring much less frequently than they used to. Occasionally when a mission was particularly difficult he would start having them again. 

She shook her head, filled with a determination to help Bucky. She sat beside him and thought for half a second before straddling him and attempting to pin his arms by his head. 

"Bucky! Bucky wake up! It's me! You're safe!" She said. He twisted his arms free and shoved her off of him. 

Steve jumped on the bed and took over pinning him down "Bucky damn it wake up!" He half yelled. 

Finally Bucky's eyes shot open and he stilled. Steve kept him pinned down for a minute longer before releasing him and climbing off of him. Bucky scooted back as far away from everyone as he could, pulling his knees to his chest.

"Y/N?" Bucky called hoarsely.

"I'm right here Bucky, I'm right here." She said softly reaching out to touch his arm but he pulled away. She noticed a fine tremor in his body. He looked between her and Steve for a moment before fleeing to the bathroom.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is Bucky's point of view.

He stood under the spray of water with closed eyes and took a deep breath. He felt like a coward for fleeing the room but he couldnt stand to be in there for a second longer. It had felt like the walls were closing in on him and he couldn't breath. Couldn't handle the looks Y/N and Steve's faces.

He stayed in the shower a lot longer than was necessary, trying to let the hot water wash away the lingering terror of the dreams. It had been a long time since he had nightmares that bad. Y/N's presence at night helped immensely but it was never perfect. Most nights if he had nightmares he would wake up in a cold sweat with his heart racing and it would take a minute or two to realize where he was. When he did he would pull Y/N close and hold her until he managed to fall back asleep or she woke. 

This morning... this morning was so much worse. He knew it was because this last mission hit him hard, hit everyone hard, but him especially. He shook his head trying to clear his thoughts and turned off the water.

As he dried off he heard music faintly coming from the other side of the door. He quickly pulled on his sweatpants and opened the door slowly just enough to see part of the room but not enough for whoever it was to notice. Y/N was busy cleaning their room singing quietly to herself, Steve was no where to be seen.

He watched her as she put fresh sheets on the bed, the dirty ones in a pile by the door. He felt a flash of guilt that she had to change the sheets so often because of him. The song changed to something soft and soothing. She began to sing along as she continued to clean.

"Laying alone with the history that made you  
Cold and uncertain inside  
Well careful now, deep breath  
The water's still rising  
But your silver lining's in sight

When you feel like you're breaking down  
And your body's just giving in  
And you can't go on broken like this  
Any longer

Close your eyes  
Don't you cry  
Let the sorrow within you subside  
Don't despair  
Have no fear  
Give your weight to me when you hear  
This lullaby

You say all seems so wrong with the life that you're living  
You're searching for some reason why  
You're so scared to trust  
You're feeling unworthy  
Aching for comfort tonight

When your heart's too sore to beat  
And you fear it might never heal  
And you feel not even beggars want you  
I do"

His feet started moving towards her of their own accord, the music drawing him in. It was like she knew exactly what he needed to hear in that moment. She turned to face him when she saw movement out of the corner of her eye. When he reached the bed and he all but collapsed on the edge of it. He reached out towards her and she closed the distance between them. She stood between his legs and ran her fingers through his wet hair. 

The song continued to play as he looked up at her. She whispered the lyrics softly while playing with his hair. He closed his eyes and just listened to the song. He felt her lips press against his forehead and linger for a second before disappearing. 

When the song ended he opened his eyes and looked up at her again. Tears filled his eyes and concern flashed across her face. 

"I'm sorry" he whispered.

"For what?" She asked confused.

"I'm sorry I'm such a fuck up. You deserve better Doll. You deserve someone who can sleep through the night without nightmares. Someone who isn't broken." He said as he started to pull away from her.

She grabbed his arm, "James Buchanan Barnes you listen to me!" She snapped and he froze. She never called him by his name, let alone his full name. 

"You are not a fuck up! And I don't give a shit what you think I deserve! I want you, broken parts and all! What about what you deserve huh? You have been through so much shit, more than literally anyone could possibly bear. You deserve the goddamn world. Now I don't ever want to hear that bullshit from you anymore ok? I love you so much. I can't possibly tell you how much I love you." She ranted with a fire in her eyes that softened at the end.

He was struck speechless by her outburst. He slid back to the edge of the bed and pulled her close again. He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her neck. She laid her cheek on the top of his head and gently rubbed his back while making soothing sounds. He took deep ragged breaths and fought back the tears that threatened to fall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! The song is called Lullaby by Emmy Rossum.
> 
> I don't own the rights to the song. 
> 
> Do not copy and paste my writing anywhere without my consent. This work is property of phantomphan4evr. Characters aren’t mine, but this fanfiction is. These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher. An electronic reference link to the original posted work may be provided for purposes of promotion or assistance of publication by the readers discretion, if proper credits are given to the author in the re-post. Posted 10/14/19

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! 
> 
> Do not copy and paste my writing anywhere without my consent. This work is property of phantomphan4evr. Characters aren’t mine, but this fanfiction is. These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher. An electronic reference link to the original posted work may be provided for purposes of promotion or assistance of publication by the readers discretion, if proper credits are given to the author in the re-post. Posted 10/14/19


End file.
